Life with Liz: Family fashion
Last week, after a busy weekend, and anticipating some snow days, I neglected to iron a week’s worth of school uniforms. By the time Wednesday night rolled around, you’d think that I might have caught up with the pile, but no, I spent my snow night curled up on the couch finishing some reading I started over Christmas break and finally digging into “Stranger Things” on Netflix. (For the record, I find it interesting, but it’s not quite living up to my expectations. A little overhyped.)
So, as the kids shuffled off to bed, and with no ambition whatsoever, I grudgingly decided to iron just what they’d need to finish out the week.
This forced my kids to make a decision: long sleeves or short sleeves. This might not seem like a big decision in the middle of January, but rest assured, it wasn’t a simple process. I understand A’s dilemma perfectly. As a middle schooler, he changes rooms every period. Some rooms are ovens and others are refrigerators.
He was wearing pullovers, but they’re either being held hostage in his locker or residing in the lost and found bin, and we’re down to our last one. His navy-blue fleece jacket was deemed unlawful by the dress code police, and cardigans just aren’t cool, so to speak. He also doesn’t like to wear long sleeves on days he has band practices because they tend to bunch at his elbows when he’s playing his trumpet.
Normally, I hang a selection in his closet for the week and let him decide when to wear long or short, but that night, I really only wanted to iron one shirt. He decided to peruse his weather app and look at his schedule, take into account how his daily schedule would change based on the anticipated two-hour delay, and get back to me.
E is a fashionista through and through. Long sleeves at 9 p.m. on Wednesday might be so last year by 7:30 a.m. on Thursday. She also believes in taking fashion risks, like frostbite. You’d be amazed at how much wardrobe variation white and navy tops and khaki and navy bottoms can deliver.
I am not amazed, I’ve seen all of them. Sometimes in the same morning. The closest thing I can find to a “rule” that E has is if she wears long pants, it usually means short sleeves. If she goes with a shorter skirt, long sleeves are a more likely possibility. Knowing she’d be tromping through the snow the next morning, I insisted that pants were a requirement, which immediately sent her into rebel mode, and all bets were off as to what she’d choose to wear on top. She retreated into her room to review accessory choices, and said she’d get back to me.
My window of ambition to iron was rapidly closing. Luckily, G came along. Executing a little rump shake and a few dabs, he jammed out, “I don’t know, I don’t care, as long as I have stuff to wear!” which immediately earned him some extra points for both creativity and making a decision. Then again, this is the kid who routinely wears a yellow shirt, red shorts, “man tights” (more commonly known as long underwear), his hunting boots, and assorted other camouflage accessories. In public.
So, not caring was really just a statement of truth. I grabbed a shirt, ironed it, and packed him off to bed. “Boom!” as he would say.
As I was waiting for the other two to return with their momentous decisions, I had a good laugh to myself as to how reflective of their three personalities this simple question was.
A reverted to science, schedule and an analytical approach to what would essentially amount to the most logical choice for his optimal comfort.
E wanted to express herself in her own way. Everything from her underwear, to her hair style, to her socks and shoes would be carefully reviewed and coordinated. And subject to change in an instant. Switched out for something at the last minute that just felt “better” to her.
And, G just rolled with the punches. How he dresses for school isn’t even on his radar, and it won’t matter to him if he’s hot, cold, overdressed, underdressed, nope. It won’t matter at all. He’ll deal with it. However, if I had asked him what color socks he was going to need to go with his basketball uniform for his game on Sunday, I would have gotten a very specific brand and answer, because that is very important to him, and has to be just right for him to play his very best.
Each of their personalities has merit and each has a downfall. A tends to overthink and dwell on things, which can lead to stress for him; however, when he does make a decision, he’s almost never wrong. E may freeze her tail off, but darn it, she’s happy and confident and if that doesn’t keep her warm, nothing will. As for G, sometimes his laissez-faire attitude makes me crazy.
I tend to make my decisions a lot more like A does. But there are other times when his shenanigans are exactly what I need for a priority adjustment. In the grand scheme of things, I think G might really have his eye on the doughnut and not the hole, and I need to just stand back and let him do his thing.
Until he starts singing, “I don’t care, if you hate, as long as I have someone to date.” I don’t think I’m going to enjoy that little song and dance quite as much as I did this one.
Liz Pinkey is a contributing writer to the Times News. Her column appears weekly in our Saturday feature section.