When I started this column back in 2016, my primary purpose was to find things to laugh about in the crazy insanity that comes with raising three kids, remodeling an old house, trying to balance work life with family life, and everything in between.

At the time, I had the WH (Wonderful Husband) who always managed to make everything 10 times the adventure it could have ordinarily been. I had plenty to write about.

Things took an unexpected turn in 2020 when COVID shut everything down. It became a bit of a challenge to keep finding things to write about as one day blended into another and we found ourselves staring at the same four walls ad nauseam. Luckily, we welcomed Duncan into the family and that set us off on a while new adventure as we adapted to life with dog.

And then, 2022 changed things forever. Life stopped being an adventure to look forward to and instead has become something to endure. I’ve tried many times to get back to the lighthearted silliness that our lives used to be, but I just cannot manage to maintain a voice that no longer feels authentic. It’s become monumentally harder as 2023 became the year that was determined to kick us while we were down.

Since Steve died, the kids have been my main priority. This year, they’re all finally teenagers, and A is on the verge of becoming a full-fledged adult. In many ways, and not just because we lost Steve, they’re no longer the people they were two years ago. This past year has been brutal for them.

There are a lot of individual events that I can point to and say why the heck did they have to go through that, on top of everything else, but since I have no answers, I have stopped asking that question. The fact is that they’re different now.

On the one hand, considering everything they’ve been through, the petty, trivial nonsense of the teenage years is small potatoes for them to navigate. On the other hand, so much of them has been laid bare that any upset, no matter how small, has the potential to turn monumental.

I know the strength they all possess, but as I’ve seen them get knocked down over and over again, I have to wonder at what point it will give out. I wonder at what point will they stop believing me when I tell them that eventually things have to start moving in the right direction.

I’m tired of trying to turn everything that happens in their lives into some kind of lesson. Even they’re not buying the “everything happens for a reason” shtick anymore.

As I’ve watched them forge ahead, despite all the obstacles in their paths, I am gratified to see that they can form new friendships, have new relationships, find new passions, and continue to be the amazing kids that I know they are.

I am hoping that 2024 can finally be a year that the pendulum swings the other direction. We certainly have a lot of potentially positive things on the horizon: A’s high school graduation, G’s driver’s license, and E finally bringing our dreaded middle school years to a close. I am hoping that I can get back to finding the humor in the everyday chaos.

This year, I planned our Christmas trip to be short and restful, which despite the clouds and cool weather that persisted for our five days in tropical paradise, we managed to achieve. I noticed that G embraced the chance to break out his wacky Hawaiian shirts and “match” them with equally obnoxious printed shorts. Since it was “cold,” he insisted on wearing yet another pattern socks with his crocs.

E packed a stack of books to read on vacation and might have even outpaced me. Reading is a hobby that she has finally returned to and seems to be enjoying again. I know from personal experience how hard it is to settle my mind enough to read an entire book, and I’m glad she’s been able to find that peace again.

A finally seemed to be able to shuck off the man of the house mantle that he’s assumed and just relax and be a kid again for a while. Of course, he still spent an hour each night finalizing college application information and being the responsible kid that he always will be, but at least he had a few hours each day of being a beach bum. All things considered, it was not the worst trip or Christmas that we could have had.

I am a person who prefers to have low expectations and occasionally be pleasantly surprised rather than having high expectations and being perpetually disappointed. The last two years have shown me that no matter how low my expectations are, things can always get lower.

So, as I face 2024, I don’t have high hopes. Mostly, I just want an even keel, without upset or distractions. I want the kids to get a break and have some smooth sailing, for maybe a week or two, if not longer. I want them to get back to being kids and enjoying the things they’re supposed to be enjoying.

I’m hopeful that things can relax enough that I can start to laugh about the minor inconveniences in life instead of being completely derailed by them.

Already that list feels too ambitious, and I know it’s out of my hands for the most part. So, the only thing I have left is to ask for the patience to accept thing things I can’t change and the wisdom to know when the responsibility for change is mine. Here is hoping that 2024 is everything you hope that it will be, and a peaceful year for all of us.