Getting old can be a lonely thing.

That line jumped out at me in the book I’m now reading.

The book is fiction but that conclusion far from fiction.

Maybe it’s because I too am getting older, even though I don’t like to admit it. Or maybe it’s because of what I see all around me in what is mostly retirement communities.

Last month alone four of my friends have had to move from the wonderful coastal community they love. After evaluating their circumstances, their age and their physical condition, they concluded it’s no longer wise for them to live away from family.

“We have a lot of friends, but when it comes down to it we have to realize our friends can’t take care of us if we have a health crisis,” said my friend Kathy. She said her family has been telling her for the past two years they need to move back to their former hometown community, where they will be taken care of if they need outside care.

Most of my friends resist that move as long as they can. But the time comes when they realize they are getting older and less able to do what they used to.

It seemed odd that Kathy should say that because she is extremely active, president of two community organizations as well as the leader of an active church group.

While she is still a dynamo in great shape, her husband is not, and she doesn’t think she can be away from him while working for her charitable and community activities.

“When we start to age we have to face facts that we’ll eventually get to the point where we need help,” said Diane, another friend. Her family lives far away and can’t be here to help. When Dee fell and broke her hip, it became clear she had to move closer to family. We just had her farewell party and we were all sad to see her go.

It’s true that we now live in what we regard as Paradise. But we pay a price for it. That price is being away from family. And, in some cases, it means not watching our grandchildren grow up.

I think we had figured living in sunny Florida would ensure more family visits, especially in winter. But it didn’t work out at way because our kids have jobs and their own family responsibilities. It’s not easy to get away.

When I think back to the life we once had when families didn’t scatter far and wide, I realize what our mobility is costing many of us.

I recall a time when my grandmother moved in with us after my grandfather died. My mother did most of the work but having five sisters meant there were many hands to help when needed.

How many multigenerational homes do you see now?

I loved the days when families lived close to each other and we didn’t have to plan far in advance for a family reunion. But those cherished days are now only happy memories.

I don’t think many families are as close as generations once were.

The truth is, many old people are suffering from acute loneliness and many are struggling to get by.

When I think of my blessings, right up at the top are two loving daughters who stay close to me. Although we each live far apart, we stay close with almost daily phone calls and their visits to me. They make it a priority, even though it’s not easy. We value family closeness as a top priority.

It was like that in my mother’s house, and it’s like that in my children’s homes. While a lot of families do value that closeness, all you have to do is look around to see that’s not the case for many families.

I look across the street and see an elderly man who is alone. Although he and his late wife raised four kids, not a single one comes to visit the father. Never. There are no Father’s Day cards, and even phone calls are infrequent. His children are distant in miles and in family dynamics.

A few houses away is an elderly woman who also suffers from loneliness. Although her son lives in town with his second family, he seldom finds time to visit. We all like her and try our best to visit. One neighbor brings her toasted cheese for lunch every Monday, while the rest of us try to bring her an occasional dinner and little treats like a box of strawberries. While she appreciates the treats, she said she most loves our visits.

“I get so starved for company,” she says.

When she turned 90, her neighbors had a little party for her. I understand it took several calls to get her son to come.

“How,” I ask, “can any adult child be so uncaring?”

One neighbor said she understood some adult children don’t think they got much affection growing up. “Maybe they are just doing what they l learned at home,” she said.

Who knows?

What I do know is when a parent dies, the separation is forever. Maybe some year there will be regrets.

Make an effort to call your parents. Pass some love around.

You’ll never be sorry for any loving act because love is its own reward.

Write to Pattie Mihalik at newsgirl@comcast.com.