What if I told you there’s a button you can push that will make you happier and improve almost every part of your life.

You might be thinking, OK, what’s the catch?

There is a catch because it will first require a little work on your part.

But it’s very doable and you’re the only one that can do it.

It involves quieting the negative voices in your head.

No, don’t think this is nonsense.

We all have a powerful inner voice.

It’s the little voice no one can hear except you. But it’s real, all right.

It the little voice that tells you what you are capable of and what you can’t do.

Psychologists have long told us if we have a constantly critical inner voice it can affect every aspect of our lives, including our self-esteem and confidence, personal and intimate relationships and our performance and accomplishments.

I read a surprising statistic that said 64% of women in an extensive survey admitted they have mostly negative inner feelings about themselves. They didn’t think they “measured up.”

Yet, in that same survey only 24% of men admitted having negative feelings about themselves.

Why do you think that is?

It’s worth thinking about.

I do know with all certainty that women are more critical of their looks and their body image.

Were we women conditioned from an early age to be self critical?

How many times do you hear women ask,“ Do I look fat in this?”

Now, how many times have you ever heard a man uttering that same “Do I look fat” question.

I’m sure the answer is never.

Psychologist Ethan Kross says we all have an active inner voice. He calls it self-talk, something we can’t help but do throughout the day.

“It does lots of good stuff for us but sometimes becomes our worst enemy.” he says.

That happens when that self talk becomes a negative voice.

Sometimes, the negative voice in our head takes over the driver’s seat in our mind, telling us we can’t do something.

I learned the power of negative self talk when I got caught in sudden electrical storm while ocean kayaking with my husband. We were far from land and everyone knows how dangerous it is to be in water during lightning.

There was nothing we could do except pray and paddle as fast as we can back to shore.

But I was so frightened, terrified actually, that my hands were badly shaking, making it harder to paddle.

I didn’t need the negative voice in my head to tell me I was in trouble.

I kept thinking “I can’t do this. I’ll never make it back to shore. I’m going to get hit by lightning.” At that point I was just about paralyzed by fear.

But then I started to think positively, reminding myself I’m a good, experienced kayaker. The voice in my head changed to say, “You can do this.”

When I changed my way of thinking I felt the change in the way I was slicing through the water. I don’t think I ever kayaked so fast in my life.

My husband taught kayaking and is much better than I am.

But here’s the amazing thing. I made it back to shore before he did, propelled by sheer fright.

That one experience graphically taught me the power our inner voice has in controlling what we do.

Simply put, if you think you can, you will.

If you think you can’t, you won’t be able to do it.

I have to remind myself of that when I’m driving. Ever since I was in a severe accident a while back I’m often afraid to drive.

When I’m in heavy traffic or when I’m trying to cope with bad road conditions my inner voice says, “You’re a terrible driver. You can’t do this.”

I have to keep praying and talking out loud, saying “I can do this.”

I never used to be a bad driver until the accident that the policeman said was my fault. I lost my nerve behind the wheel.

I don’t make it any better by having my inner voice keep reminding me I’m a bad driver. I’m trying to change that self-defeating talk, changing my inner voice to “I can do this.”

While we all have some critical thoughts, some people have such a bad habit of drowning in negativity. Listen to them talk and you’ll listen for a long time without hearing anything positive. Those negative thoughts then become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Experts say we can change that once we become aware of it.

One woman who is trying online dating says she floundered when she met someone because her hidden inner voice kept tells her she has nothing interesting to say. When she changed her thought process she found she could, indeed, carry on interesting conversation.

Experts tell us engaging in more positive self talk can override critical thoughts. That’s what I experienced during my kayak misadventure.

Never under estimate the power of positive thinking.

That was Norman Vincent Peale’s message decades ago when he published his blockbuster bestselling book, “The Power of Positive Thinking.”

That book is still relevant today. More than ever, that positive thinking message needs to be heard.

Email Pattie Mihalik at newsgirl@comcast.com