In 2010, Detroit Tigers pitcher Armando Galarraga lost his chance at throwing a perfect game in the Major Leagues when first base umpire Jim Joyce made a safe call on a hitter on what should have been the final out of the game. Joyce made a glaring mistake; the runner was definitely out, but with no video review rule in place, his call stood, and Galarraga was deprived of making baseball history.

In May 2002, a drunken driver struck a Mazda and killed two young women in the car. Renee Napier’s 20-year-old daughter Meagan died.

“The wailing and crying comes from the depths of your soul,” said Renee. “The pain is so horrible.”

On Oct. 6, 2006, Charles Roberts, distraught over the death of his newborn daughter nine years previously, shot and killed five children and then himself in an Amish schoolhouse.

After discovering that his mother had hired a hit man to kill his father, Stephen Owens refused to visit her after she was sent to prison.

The very next day after Joyce had made the wrong call that canceled Galarraga’s perfect game, in front of thousands of fans in Detroit and more watching on TV, Galarraga met a tearful Joyce at home plate before another game would begin. They shook hands and everyone cheered.

This moment was a perfect example of why baseball and why life are imperfect. We all can empathize with Joyce because we all make mistakes. The baseball world was angry with Joyce when he made the wrong call, but after he admitted his error, he showed us his honesty. Perhaps even more significant was Galarraga publicly displaying an act of forgiveness to Joyce with his handshake.

The drunken driver who killed Meagan Napier, Eric Smallridge, sent letters to Renee Napier expressing his remorse over killing her daughter. Renee saw how distraught Eric was at his sentencing of 22 years in prison. After exchanging letters over time, she lobbied to have his prison term cut in half.

After he was released from prison, Eric and Renee became friends, and together they have been speaking in high schools and warning students about the dangers of drunken driving.

Family members of the child victims murdered in the Amish school attended Charles Roberts’ funeral and consoled his widow. Later the Amish community offered financial assistance to her as well.

In August 2009, Stephen Owens visited his mother in prison for planning the murder of his father for the first time in 13 years. After an emotional and intense three-hour discussion, Stephen made his peace with her.

In each of these situations, the victims displayed incredible acts of forgiveness. Whether it be something as simple as a baseball game or as horrific as the brutal deaths of loved ones, the capacity and the courage to forgive the offenders by these people was extraordinary.

And yet in our everyday ordinary lives, we sometimes find it impossible to forgive someone who has hurt us. Recently, I spoke with a woman who ended a six-year relationship with a man because his strong support of Donald Trump conflicted with her liberal political views.

“We argued every day about this until I couldn’t take it anymore, so I told him to leave and not come back.”

I wonder if after Trump leaves office, they might get back together again.

Holding a grudge for as long as forever for some people breaks apart what once were healthy and beneficial relationships. I have three such ongoing conflicts in my extended family, and I’d bet you who are reading this column know of at least one yourself.

Confucius said, “To be wronged is nothing, unless you continue to remember it.”

Some people wear their grudges proudly on their sleeves and even brag about them to their friends. In his book, “Life, the Truth, and Being Free,” Steve Maraboli writes, “Holding a grudge and harboring anger and resentment is poison to the soul.”

Forgiveness is hard. It takes courage, but it can lead to powerful healing that allows both parties an opportunity to move back together or to move on to live and love again.

Those who have summoned the courage to forgive a murderer will tell you that they do this in memory of their deceased son or daughter or wife who would want them to live the rest of their lives without waking up every morning and hating the criminals, who obviously cannot bring back the lives of their loved ones. For as long as the hatred is harbored, the quality of life is limited and compromised.

Author Laurie Buchanan writes, “Forgiveness isn’t for the other person. It’s for you. Holding a grudge gets heavy and depletes energy. Forgiveness offloads excess baggage, freeing us to live light.”

To get over the pain from someone who hurts us might not always be possible. The goal is to forgive and get through the pain and to restore peace of mind.

Rich Strack can be reached at katehep11@gmail.com.