Couple gives the gift of family to 8 kids
JIM THORPE (AP) - 'Twas two weeks before Christmas and all through Roxanne and August Long's house ... teenagers thundered toward the dinner table, where a mountain of spaghetti waited.
Plates clinked and elbows connected as kids - seven boys ages 14 to 19, and one 5-year-old girl - filled their plates and settled into chairs. Then, silence, as they bowed their heads in prayer before digging in."There's eight of them, but I cook for 20," Roxanne said with a laugh. "They eat for 20."The scene in the Longs' meticulously decorated Jim Thorpe home might seem typical for a big, busy family. But the Long family is far from ordinary. Four of their children are adopted, one is a foster child and the Longs are court-ordered guardians of three."They're kids who have been through a lot, more things than kids should go through," Roxanne said. "To take eight kids and make them a family, that's a gift."The Longs were named the 2016 Outstanding Adoptive Family by the Lehigh County Office of Children and Youth Services. The agency, which oversees the care of children who are removed from their parents amid allegations of abuse and neglect, handled most of the family's adoptions.Caseworker Roseanne DeSilver said the couple's commitment to treating all the children in their care equally makes them a valuable asset to child advocates."They have wonderful parenting skills and they don't give up on anyone," DeSilver said. "Children are treated the same, whether they're there for a day or for life."Although they dabbled in taking in foster children when their own children, Matthew, 33, and Sarah, 32, were younger, the couple began building their present family in 2009, shortly after Roxanne's father died.Roxanne was her dad's caretaker in his final years, and his death in 2008 hit her hard, she said. That loss, along with the nagging empty-nest feeling that had persisted since Matthew and Sarah left for college, created a depressing void."Both of us always loved kids, and when our kids were growing up there was always a gang of their friends here," August said."Suddenly, the house was so empty," Roxanne added. "So I filled it."As the children arrived, August, a retired engineer and general contractor, began a series of never-ending remodeling projects. The formal dining room became bedrooms. Walls came down and were repositioned. Sections were added.In the end, the four-bedroom split-level boasted eight bedrooms and three bathrooms, plus two in-law suites. Some of the room came from Roxanne's former florist shop, which had been attached to the home. She retired from the business several years ago and is now lobbying August for a bigger kitchen.Roxanne and August are constantly on the move, they said. All the boys play sports - four are currently in the thick of wrestling season - and several must attend court-ordered counseling. All but one of the teens are still in school, and Adyson goes to preschool."Dad comes to all our sporting events that he can," said Steven, who has been with the Longs for more than three years. "When I first came here, I didn't have anything. Now I have more clothes than I can wear."The family's weekly grocery bill runs between $400 and $600, Roxanne said. Although the Longs receive a foster care stipend, it doesn't cover many of the extras they provide for the teens, including cellphones.All the children have chores. Practicing on a used, 12-seat school bus the couple recently bought to transport the brood to sporting events, some of the older teens are learning car repair. Some also help August on contracting jobs.Although they didn't set out to fill their house with mostly teenage boys, that's the type of child that seems to land on their doorstop most often. August, a longtime youth sports coach and past president of Jim Thorpe's Little League program, thinks it's no coincidence."They usually want to play sports, so I get them involved in sports. Truthfully, I love every minute of it," he said.Teens are also the age group that's the hardest to find homes for, said Nell Sokalski, a case manager at Lehigh Children and Youth. Most families willing to adopt foster children request a child younger than 10. Of the 19 children adopted through Lehigh County Children and Youth in 2016, only two were older than 14. In Pennsylvania, children may stay in foster care until age 21.As Christmas approached, the Long house was abuzz with preparations for the annual family gathering, which brings more than 30 people to the home. Posing beneath the 15 stockings hanging on the fireplace - some belong to extended family members as well as the family dog, Lexie - the children talked excitedly about the board game marathon that's the centerpiece of the party."It's very competitive," Joseph said. "And kind of hectic."Roxanne said she usually puts up four Christmas trees, though the family decorated just two this year. All the boys wore suits and ties, and little Adyson put on a dress before the family attended Christmas Eve services at their church, the Episcopal Parish of St. Mark and St. John in Jim Thorpe.Some of the children in the Longs' home still have some contact with their biological families, and holidays can be emotional for them, Roxanne said. Some of their foster children may eventually return to their parents."That is hard," Roxanne said. "But while they're here they know that they've been part of a family. And they will always be part of a family."